It’s Over

Posted on March 19, 2014 by scoopsontherun

Well, the decision has finally been made. I will not be running the New Jersey Marathon.

How did I get to that final decision?

For those of you who follow my little blog on a regular basis you know how hard this training season has been for me health-wise. That kidney stone is one tough mother. It survived the shockwave procedure. I still experience sharp pains when I try to run hard.

Now let’s throw in how I have been feeling about this marathon. After initially being excited about it my heart just wasn’t into this. My long runs, which I normally enjoy, were chores. My running should never feel like that.

The stress I was feeling from not being able to train consistently and at the level where I felt it should be at was taking a toll. I was becoming incredibly depressed and not very forgiving of myself. I was in a horrible funk that not even my closest friends could get me out of it.

Before this past weekend’s NYC Half Marathon I had an idea of what I wanted to do. My first goal was to run the race at my marathon goal pace and my second was to complete it with same pace that I finished the NYC Marathon. In the back of my mind I sort of knew these would both be very hard to accomplish and knew I would soon make the decision not pull out of the NJ Marathon.

At about mile six I knew I would not be able to run the race my goal pace for the marathon and then at mile eight I knew I would not be able to meet my second goal pace. It was then that I knew I would not run the marathon.

But the great thing is that instead of feeling bummed out I felt a tremendous sense of relief. Granted I still tried to at least hit my second goal but I was ok if I did not make it. By the time I hit the Battery Tunnel I knew it for sure and I was still ok with it.

After the race I told my best buddy, the one who has dealt head on with my depression over my training that I wanted to run the NJ Half Marathon with her. She’s on board.

I still don’t think I ran a great half marathon but I did get a course PR so that is at least something and I’m satisfied with that. I know I have more work to do but at least I don’t have the weight of a marathon I don’t want to run on my shoulders.

I’m not sure if a spring marathon will be in my future with unpredictable winters but we’ll see. Right now I’m looking forward to running my 20th half marathon in Sleepy Hollow with Doreen (see above about best buddy) and just enjoying it. No goals for this one expect to have fun.

I don’t have any goals for the NJ Half either but do plan on training harder for the Brooklyn Half in May. But I still have to go through round two of this kidney stone procedure so I also know that I have to be more realistic about what I can accomplish at this time.

My realistic goals for right now are to be a little less harder on myself, refocus on my running, rest my body a bit, and just enjoy the fact that I can run.

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That Runner’s High

Posted on March 7, 2014 by scoopsontherun

It has been a while since I felt this good. Today is a rest day but this time I feel like I really deserve this one.

For the first time in seven weeks I have completed all of my training runs during the week. This is huge!

Even better is that there is a an extra bounce in my step today. It can also be because it is Friday and there wasn’t a line in my Starbucks this morning.

Last night was my second Deep Water Running class and so far it is doing what I hoped it would. That is to give me a good, low-impact workout that fits in with my marathon training. I took this a few years ago and enjoyed it then but this would be the first time incorporating into major marathon training.

I always recommend taking this with a good buddy, so of course that meant Doreen was recruited for this. Not that you need to have a good buddy but it helps when you want to be a part of the peanut gallery. Important note: You will be getting a tough workout so there really isn’t an opportunity to fully be peanut gallery-ish.

Since this is my second time at this I have a bit more confidence in what is expected and feel that I am getting a better grasp of my form. With that comes the feeling of getting a good workout in. I love that my legs feel little wobbly when I get out of the pool and having that “you had a good workout last night” feeling when you get up the next morning.

That feel good feeling thing is making me look forward to this weekend’s training and I can’t remember when that last happened.

Eight miles is on the plan for tomorrow, and inspired by my aforementioned buddy Doreen, I’m going to run a route that I haven’t run since November. It’s my go to eight mile route near my house that’s a little flat in parts and a little hilly in others with some great scenery.

Making it’s debut on this run will be some new gear that I’m hoping will help alleviate some of the kidney pain I have been experiencing.

When I was reviewing the things that went wrong on my aborted 17 mile long run and my previous long runs was that at about the five or six mile mark my kidney started to hurt. Yes, this is because I had a shock wave procedure to remove my larger kidney stone. Well that procedure left me feeling beat up and with a very tender kidney. When my trusty FuelBelt rubbed up against that side and caused most of the kidney discomfort.

So I broke down and got myself a CamelBak. I figure this will come in handy for a few reasons but mainly because I’ll be having this procedure again at the beginning of May. My hope is that since this won’t be cutting across my kidney area I’ll be relived of that discomfort of along and can just focus on the usual bits of discomfort that we’re all used to.

This injury has at times taken a toll on me. I’m not used to having such an injury that just completely took me out. It makes me wish for the days when I used to complain about a little tendonitis in the foot or a tight calf.

That is why this week of consistent training has been exactly what I needed — physically and mentally — to get over my little slump.

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Refocus

Posted on March 6, 2014 by scoopsontherun

Last week I was ready to throw in the towel after a dismal first half of marathon training due to weather and kidney stone issues. My 17 mile long run just didn’t happen and it so happened to be the week that I told myself to call it quits if it wasn’t going to happen.

For better or worse a few people talked me back from the edge of the cliff on Sunday and told me to give it another shot. But in order for that to happen I needed to focus and not skip any workouts. I agreed.

So far this week I have managed to do every training run, albeit on the treadmill. I have come to expect that is going to happen more often than not for a bunch of my runs during the week. I just have to suck it up.

This week is my 18 mile long run and yes, I am freaking out about it. It’s still going to be on the cold side and coordinating a place to leave my coat and some warm clothes to change into after are tricky. But I have to do this run. No questions.

The kidney is still an issue. Some days it hurts because it is passing the stone that blasted to bits and other days it’s just tender and sore. At this point I am almost convinced that I’m going to have this kind of discomfort for the rest of my life. Yes, this is how long this has been going on and yes, I know the pain will go away. But in order for me to start getting on with things I’m having to work with the mentality that I will always have this and need to learn how to manage and deal with it. No time like an 18 mile long run to do that.

On the whole, I am not excited for this marathon. I’m hoping it will happen soon but right now this just feels like a chore that I have to get through. Not even seeing the finishers medal got me excited. Perhaps a week or two of solid training will help with that.

I’ve also decided to rethink my goals for this one. Right now I’m convinced I am going to do worse than New York City which I do not want to do. Right now I’ll be happy with a one second PR.

Perhaps more importantly than all that is that I have been reminded to just focus on what I’m running at any given moment. I need to focus on just the mile I am currently running and not the 15 ahead of me. This of course is easier said than done but it helped with my eight mile run yesterday and I know I’ll try really hard to keep doing that for this weekend’s 18 mile long run.

It’s do or die time or maybe both.

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Waiting

Posted on February 19, 2014 by scoopsontherun
I want my kidney to be this happy again. Maybe minus the hands. That can't feel too good inside your body.

I want my kidney to be this happy again. Maybe minus the hands. That can’t feel too good inside your body.

Yesterday was the big the day that I would say goodbye to Fred, the kidney stone. I underwent Shock Wave Lithotripsy and now I wait. I’m not really in any pain, nothing that I wasn’t experiencing prior to the procedure.

I had planned on feeling more pain as the fragments of Fred would be passing out of me and also planned that there would be no running this week. But since I’m not feeling any different than before, aside from being tired, I think I’ll hit the roads tomorrow for my four mile run.

I’m still having major confidence about this upcoming marathon. I’ve been getting my long runs completed but have not been able to run consistently. While I think this is the case for just about everyone in the Northeast, I just know that for me to perform my best I need to maintain my training schedule.

I know I gave myself another week after this procedure to decide on what to do about this marathon but I’ve got nine weeks left. So of course I’m wondering if that is enough time. Can I turn things around successfully? But of course I won’t know this until this kidney stone stuff subsides for good.

I’m getting way too anxious about this waiting.

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Miami Vice Err Half

Posted on February 8, 2014 by scoopsontherun

Well I had another disappointing Miami Half Marathon. As much as I try to remind myself that I don’t do well at destination races I still hope.

My training was erratic due to the weather and my kidney stone. At least this year is was not due to motivation. Then during the first half of the race I had stomach cramping issues. I got that taken care of for three miles where I tired to make up the time but at mile 10 my kidney stone decided it did not want run hard.

While I wasn’t aiming for a PR, I had given up on that idea weeks ago, I was hoping to be close to my PR time. I was off by 12 minutes. Even though I got a course PR I was disappointed. Not so much for the half but for my overall training for the NJ Marathon. If you can call my half marathon training erratic you can call the overall marathon training a near disaster.

For example this week I am supposed to total 36 miles but will only be making 22. I have only had one week that got close to 30 and that was 27 miles. I can’t achieve my goal if I only rely on the weekend long run. Then let’s just throw in the fact that I just feel incredibly out of shape. My gut tells me if I continue like this my time will be worse than my NYC Marathon time of this past year.

Now I’m facing the hard decision. Do I keep plugging away and hope my gut is wrong or do I drop down to the half to try and restore some dignity? I figure that I have three weeks to try and figure this out. One of those weeks will include the kidney stone procedure that will wipe out almost a whole week of training.

This is going to be a long three weeks. I feel bad for the people who have to be near me as I work this out. I apologize in advance.

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The Scene of the Crime

Posted on January 22, 2014 by scoopsontherun

I registered for the Brooklyn Half today. The same event that just happens to be the scene of me hitting rock bottom in my running last year. I am hoping that this year will be different.

I had made last year’s Brooklyn Half a big goal race for me. It was my 15th half marathon and the same event where I ran my first half. It was almost fitting that I finished both in the same way. I was relieved they were done and not quite sure how I finished at all.

But last year’s race served as the wake up call I needed to get serious about my running again and by July there were noticeable results. I’m hoping I don’t have to wait that long for another slap in the face about being serious with my running. And, can I use any more cliches in these first few paragraphs?

We’re experiencing another Polar Vortex here in NYC where the current temperature is 16 degrees but feels like zero. That is actually an improvement. This weather has wrecked havoc on my training (there I go again with the cliches). I started to get more consistent last week but have yet to run this week. I have a marathon in 13 weeks and am starting to feel under trained. I have got to get over these winter blahs and get moving again!

I have no idea how this Brooklyn Half will go. It’s three weeks after the NJ Marathon and I have never run a half so soon after a full marathon. And I just realized that I was considering the Escape to the Palisades Half Marathon a week after. Um, that might be a bad idea. I think we can finally say I have lost my mind.

But back to this lack of training thing. It’s starting to worry me — a lot and I can’t seem to get myself going to be more consistent. If only it could be summer right now then things would be so much better. It’s frustrating and worrisome to the point that I think I may have to scrap some of my goals for the marathon if I don’t things turned around in the next couple of weeks. If I don’t that will be a worse crime than last year’s Brooklyn Half.

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Consistently Inconsistent

Posted on January 16, 2014 by scoopsontherun

That blog title perfectly explains how my training runs have gone lately.

Between the weather and a grumpy kidney stone that I named Fred I just have not been running as consistently as I have wanted or planned to. I am not at all happy about this.

So, after a emotionally down week at the beginning of last week, I knew I had to get my butt in gear. I was able to complete five training runs in a row. Not all were that actual distances I was supposed to run but I got the consistent miles in. I’m hoping to do the same this week.

Winter is always a hard season for me, as it is for many runners. I just don’t like the season and not so much of early spring either. My miles always go down during this time of year as does my motivation. Trying to trick myself out of this funk has been hard.

I have a big race coming up, that hasn’t helped much and it typically never has at this time of year. I’ve been going to the gym when work doesn’t get in the way but there is only a certain amount of time that I have on the treadmill.

Calculating some vDot System stuff. Or just being super nerdy.

Calculating some vDot System stuff. Or just being super nerdy.

So today, I brought out the big guns. I went into my nerd mode and calculated numbers and played with spreadsheets. Specifically, I used the Vdot system. If you want a detailed description of this you can go here but it basically helps you calculate your training threshold and provides some predicted race times based on your current fitness level.

So I now have current paces based on my new average pace. I now know what paces to hit for certain types of training and a good idea for some of my predicted finish times for some upcoming races can be. The caveat — I’ve got to put in the work.

Another cool thing about this is that it confirmed that I’m on target for my NJ Marathon time goals. It matches exactly with my “B” goal that will give me a 12 minute PR. The marathon is on April 27 and there is a realistic shot at improving enough so that I can meet my “A” goal. Again, I need to put in the work.

I’m also not far off from another half marathon PR in Miami and that is exciting to think about. My last long run for Miami is this weekend and if I can run consistently and push myself this is a realistic goal.

So this starts with my first threshold run at my new confirmed pace for this. I will embrace my need to love the numbers and that is a good motivating factor to myself out of this little rut that I’m in. At the same time, I’m not going to beat myself up if I don’t hit some of these predicted finish times. After all, they are just predictions.

I need to get back on the good side of consistency.

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That Time to Look Back

Posted on December 31, 2013 by scoopsontherun

Ah, it’s that wonderful time of the year when we bloggers all write that year in review post. I wish I could say I was going to break the mold but I’m not.

When 2013 started I had one simple goal — to make the year about me. That, of course, was easier said than done. My mother was still recovering from her almost year-long illness and I was still her primary caregiver.

I had a goal of getting a new half marathon PR at the Miami Half in January. It didn’t happen but I did get a course PR and still had an amazing amount of fun. It was the first trip I was able to take after my mother’s illness. I needed that trip in so many ways.

Then I came back and ran a half marathon in February and then ran the NYC Half in March. Both were lackluster at best and that was when I lost my running mojo. I ran very little in April and dealt with fatigue and an achy quad. But I still had hopes of getting that half marathon PR at the Brooklyn Half in May. It was going to be 15th half marathon as well as the location of my very first half.

I failed miserably at the PR. Still enjoyed it to a certain extent but it served as the wake up call that I needed. I realized that the reason I lost my running mojo was because my body needed a rest from being a care giver and running all the time. I was on high alert for a year and half and my body knew it was time to just rest and that in order for me to get going again I would have to take baby steps.

I did just that on Memorial Day Weekend by starting the Runner’s World Streak Challenge. That goal was to run at least one mile a day until July 4. I did and I fell in love with running again. Then good things really started to happen.

My running improved tremendously and I felt good about myself again. I set a modest goal for my marathon and had several panic attacks about that.

Then the PRs started to happen and just didn’t seem as thought they could stop no matter what distance I ran. I even got that elusive half marathon PR that had been haunting me for four years and then broke that again two weeks later. If that doesn’t make you feel good about yourself I don’t know what will.

I felt really great going into my marathon and then had a major panic attack when my former running coach said I could run it faster. I did and scored that one hour plus PR. I’m still in awe about that.

One of the things I have really been proud of is not having the usual post-marathon blahs. While I haven’t been running as much, I have been running consistently and keeping my new pace pretty steady. I’ve continued to get those PRs and now just only have one distance where I did not PR. That would be a three mile race and since I just have one of those a year, that’s not a biggie. I expect to shatter that next year.

I’ve started training for another Miami Half with my good buddy. This always fun half should be even more fun with Doreen making the trip with me. I cannot wait for Miami this year!

I’ve also started training for a spring marathon, which will be the first time I doing one of these. So far the panic attacks have been minimal and hopefully they will stay that way.

My final mileage for 2013 is 1084, a number I never thought I would reach and look forward to hitting that again next year if not out right surpassing it.

So, while there were a lot of great things to look back upon this past year I am very excited about 2014 because I’ve got a pretty good foundation to build on now.

Happy New Year!

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Didn’t I Just Do This?

Posted on December 26, 2013 by scoopsontherun

Well, marathon training has started again. It’s hard to believe that it was only this past July that I started training for the NYC Marathon and now six months later I’m started this whole thing over again for the New Jersey Marathon in April.

This will be my first spring marathon so bring on all the usual anxiety attacks and oh yeah, I have a new goal in  mind. In order to hit this goal I will need to improve my pace by 40 seconds. 40 seconds!!!

Training has been rough this first week for reasons that do not have anything to do with the holidays. For the past few weeks I have been dealing with a kidney stone issue. I named him Fred and found out today that he has siblings. The good news is that they are not obstructing anything so I can take my time and come up with a plan for charging them back rent and evicting them. I have also found that when they get a little painful it just zaps me of energy and making running harder.

The weather has been hard to deal with. Every year I have to work hard to adjust to running in the morning before work, in the dark, and in the cold. My bed wins this battle more often than not. Then I feel like crap because I didn’t run and then I feel guilty because I know I could have easily gone running.

But this is only the first week of the marathon training and it’s not like I haven’t been running.

After the NYC marathon I continued to run but at much more leisurely paces and shorter distances. I knew I needed to give my body a bit of a rest before entering into full out training mode again. That training for the Miami Half Marathon began after Thanksgiving and so far is going well when I just consider the long runs. (See note about kidney stones and cold weather.)

In the past I have been a little scared of making this race a goal race but with the help of my buddy we are both going to PR. But I really can’t wait for this race. There is such a pleasant familiarity of the course and warm weather to make it all so much fun.

This of course will then lead me right into the nitty gritty part of my marathon training. This is when the miles will really start adding up and I have to figure out how to run them in the coldest part of the year. Does anyone want to join me for some long, cold miles in February? Does that sound appealing to anyone? If you don’t want to run with me how about holding my coat and making hot cocoa for me? Winter terrifies me and that is aside from the usual panic attacks.

Oh and hey, remember that strength training I was supposed to for my last marathon? That strength training I never did? Well, I’m going to try and make more of an honest effort to do it this time around. Seriously. Really.

No, I don’t have the personal trainer I was hoping to have but I have plenty of exercises that I have been posting on my Pinterest page. I just have to do some of them. I’m not committing to all of them just some so that I can see if it helps. I know I need to strengthen my core. I think we all do. I also need to strengthen my quads for all that long distance running stuff.

This really does seem like my fall marathon plan. Well, almost. I think I’m being more realistic and I know I have had far fewer panic attacks than last year. So I’m off to a fabulous start.

Now, how does one charge back rent to a bunch of kidney stones?

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Reconnecting

Posted on November 23, 2013 by scoopsontherun

There is always that period of time after a big race when there can be a let down. It’s not always the “what now?” kind of let down. I many cases it is in the form of needing to rest the body and having a hard time getting back to running consistently.

I know from my past marathons that this is one of my biggest concerns. It’s so hard to get back into any sort of regular running after you have been running consistently for 16-18 weeks straight. Thankfully, I know I’m not the only one who has had this problem.

Part of the problem for November marathons is the timing. They usually happen a few weeks before Thanksgiving and well we’re still taking it easy from the marathon and then there is the pie. We can run later. Work with me here, I’m trying to create a sound theory for us. By the time the long Thanksgiving weeks rolls around I always feel as though I am shaped like that last piece of pie I ate, for breakfast, before that run.

Then there’s all of other winter holidays and parties and well drinking loads of wine while reconnecting with all those people you lost track while training for the marathon is more important at that time. Sometimes you need the wine just to deal with all those people.

Yup, still working on a theory here.

Let’s not forget that it gets cold. Weren’t we just running in shorts? This week is the perfect example. On Friday, I ran in shorts. Today it was thin running tights, tomorrow it’s supposed to 14 degrees here in NYC. Seriously????

The theory I’m working on is look at all that stuff! No wonder it’s so hard to run consistently during this time of here and of course we can become disconnected from the sport we love so much.

You know how when you go on a trip for a week and you find you miss someone so much that it almost hurts and then when you finally get home and they hug you your world gets right again? (And that was an awesome run-on sentence that I refuse to change.) That amazing feeling of reconnecting with someone is incredible. That’s the feeling I also experience when I reconnect with a regular training program. It helps me find the balance I need in order to be good to myself and my friends. Yes, it also helps that the majority of my friends are runners but that’s besides the point.

Yup, we're going back to this place again. Ready to join me on my crazy train? (c) Stacey Cooper

Yup, we’re going back to this place again. Ready to join me on my crazy train? (c) Stacey Cooper

So I’ve already got my training plan for the Miami Half and now, now, now have decided on a spring marathon. This will be the first time I am ever going to do a spring marathon so the panic attack will start right about now.

I’ll be running the New Jersey Marathon on April 27. I’ve got my number one fan and support team (Team Scoops) in place. Amazing people I tell you.

Now I just have to figure out how to do long runs in winter. If you live in NYC there is a good chance I’ll just be showing up at your place for a warm shower, a foam roll, and hot cocoa. You’re ready for me right?

Seriously though, how the hell do you run 20 miles in winter and not die?

I’m looking forward to this new challenge and yes, I have a new goal time in mind. (Panic attack number two just started.) But the thought of reconnecting with my training plan and tweaking it here and there is incredibly exciting.

Let’s do this thing!

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